deep talk: Restless

12/08/2015 12:49:00 am

it's 12:31am.
I can't get to sleep
Mainly because worries have been over-crowding my head lately.
I honestly felt like this year could have been better for me... but I guess that's not the case.
It's kind of difficult to keep myself happy at times. Especially when there's this on-going anxiety around people. After nights of restlessness, I discovered that I feel very worried of what others think of me, whether I'm doing the right thing... maybe just slowly becoming a people-pleaser.
There's already so much for me to take in, i.e studying Architecture takes up my life.. yet it just so happens that a lot of drama happens upon me.

I honestly feel so tired. 
It's exhausting to be Lauren.
I really really want to get out of this gloomy phase of my life. 

Wished it never ever happened.
I've played my part. I've tried. Really have.. tried to make things better.

I feel like I've forgotten the little joys in my life, those precious night-ins where I just literally do nothing and watch movies with my flatmate, or just receiving a cute text message from mum.
I should really treasure these moments. It's these little things make a difference to my mood.

Why restrain yourself with all this worries + sadness?
Why cry yourself to sleep just because one doesn't appreciate you, doesn't make an effort to speak? One that easily throws away your existence so recklessly- without saying anything?

Positive note to self: Imagine yourself within 5 years time. Just remember all that is happening now... and you'll look back laughing at it. It'll be nothing. 

Hopefully time will heal.

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  1. Aw Lauren.. *huggles you* These times shall past.. I know you're feeling down now but remember that things can and will get better. "There's always a rainbow after every storm". Have you tried talking to someone about this? It really helps to spill your heart out to someone you trust.

    And don't forget to give yourself a break every now and then. Architecture is a tough course and you deserve some rests too! Please take care <3

    ♥ Nana's Notebook

  2. hang on. the year's ending. who knows what the new year will bring :)

    Jessica |

  3. Lovely blog! :)

  4. keep you mind on that positive note you included! it might seem like the world now, but time always heals everything!

    love, rach.
    So, hi.

  5. Oh, the gloom. Oh, the sadness. They've descended upon many a time across these few years and they're the worst, but know this, Lauren; things will get better. It did for me, and trust me when I say with was a huge surge upwards from me falling down a restless pit.

    Feel better. <3

    May | THE MAYDEN | Bloglovin'

  6. YOU CAN DO THIS LAUREN!!! Sometimes its REALLY difficult to say that we have to stay positive but we all have to :'c This was such a lovely post and I hope that through this you've released some on your sadness. Architecture is tough but not a lot of beautiful things come easy

    BCfactor Blog

  7. Thank you for sharing, you are such a great person I am sure everythinh will be just fine, good luck!!!


  8. Keep your chin up, love! Darkness only leads to light. Stay positive!


    Looks by Lau


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